I'm bored, let's pick on Ken Penders.
Now as you guys all know, I fucking HATE Ken Penders. Not just as a writer, but as a person too. His ego makes him one of the most hated people I've ever heard of. I hate him THAT much. And what he's done to the comic and his dumbass plans for the Lara-Su Chronicles just makes me hate him even more. But what REALLY makes me hate the asshole is his ego. Egotisim is one of the most annoying traits a human can have and I cannot STAND egotisim. Ken Penders is such an egotist that it's actually kindy creepy. It's like he's so sure of himself that he's like the "Best Writer Archie Sonic has ever had" or something. Ken Penders, that title belongs to Ian Flynn. He has made quality stories with fluid, amazing artwork to accompany them. You on the other hand make garbage that has either OK to awful artwork accompanying it. Replacing you with Ian Flynn was the best thing that ever happened to Archie Sonic and I LOVE the reboot because now I never have to acknowledge your garbage ever again. As for your Lara-Su Chronicles, we all know how THAT'S going to go. It'll crash and burn and you will be a penniless loser on the side of the street wondering what the fuck went wrong.
Now I've just given him a "Reason You Suck Speech", let's move onto the point of this journal. I came across an entry on Bumbleking where Ken Penders details his "plans" for Archie Sonic after Issue 159. And I have to say, they're pretty damn bad. Thank god he was replaced! Now in this journal, I'm going to compared his plans, which are for Issues 160-200, to the 160-200 we actually got just to prove how much better Ian Flynn is than Ken Penders. Well, let's go. Like I said, I'm bored and I've got nothing better to do so let's bully Ken Penders by picking apart his "plans" for the post 159 era of Archie Sonic:SONIC: ALL MY TOMORROWS... (SONIC #160 & #161) - King Sonic discovers he’s returned to the scene of one of his greatest battles and possibly the cause of his problems in the future. The problem is that no one can see or hear him, and any attempt to take action results in someone suspecting a supernatural cause. When he returns to the future, he discovers a changed world on top of having failed to change events in the past. As a last resort, Rotor sends Nicole into the past after having created her.
Do I need to explain what's wrong with this idea? First of all, nobody gives a shit about 25 Years Later Ken Penders so stop writing about it! And anyway, the story itself is just ridiculous. King Sonic returns to a scene of one of his greatest battles that is the cause of his problems in the future but nobody can see or hear him? What? What's the point of this if nobody can see or hear him? It was stupid in One More Day and it's stupid here! And second of all, how can his attempts to take action result in a supernatural cause? If nobody can see or hear him then isn't he technically a ghost, ergo he can't touch anything? So the synopsis ALONE is full of plot holes! Wow...I mean, all that exists of this story is the synopsis and already there's a plot hole! And finally, why is Nicole from the future? It makes no sense and Nicole's already been sent to the past so why does it need to happen again? And what the hell's she going to do? She's a computer! She can't change King Sonic's future!
Now compare this to the 160-161 we actually got. We get Sonic's birthday, the debuts of Bean the Dynamite and Bark the Polar Bear and Evil Sonic becoming Scourge, as well as a set-up to Enerjak: Reborn with the return of Dr. Finitevus. Now doesn't THAT sound much better than Penders's idea? The answer is "Of course it fucking does Scott!". SONIC: LAST TANGO IN KNOTHOLE (SONIC #162) - Uncle Chuck and Rosie emerge on the town for a real date, and it’s up to Sonic to play guardian angel and prevent Robotnik’s stealth-bots from spoiling the happy couple’s evening. (16 pages)
Pfft...is Ken Penders high or something?! I mean does this sound even REMOTELY interesting in the slightest?! First of all, Chuck and Rosie have no romantic interest in each other, so this comes out of nowhere. Plus, they're old. It's a bit late for them to start dating now. And also, why would Robotnik take an interest in them? I mean I understand Chuck but what the hell's Rosie ever done? This idea was bad from the start and I'm glad it'll never see the light of day.
Now the actual 162 was the start to the "Darkest Storm" saga. And believe me when I say that the actual Issue 162 was MUCH better than this crap!SONIC: GIRLS NIGHT OUT (SONIC #163) - Some teasing from Ash results in Mina and Amy Rose making their way into Robotnik’s stronghold to prove they’re just as capable on their own as any Freedom Fighter (re: Sonic). When Sally hears what they’re up to, she and Sonic head out after them, only to discover Rouge and Nic the Weasel are on the scene, each looking to abscond with the rare gem that will power Robotnik’s latest weapon. (16 pages if 1 issue or 2 11-page stories if spread over two issues)
Wow Ken Penders, you are a hypocrite. He says he won't use Mina and he only used Mina when forced too by the editor and yet here he's using Mina. As you know, I hate hypocrisy. Anyways, this idea DOES have some merit to it such as the female empowerment thing going on with Mina and Amy but I dunno, I'm not buying for a minute that Ash would actually tease Mina into doing that. And he should know better than to tease Amy too. And also shouldn't Rouge be with Evil Sonic? I mean, she left with him at the end of Issue 151 so why is she with Nic now? Great, ANOTHER plot hole! Penders loves these doesn't he? And why is Rouge with Nic? I don't think Nic would ever be involved with Rouge at all. And also, despite the female empowerment theme here, it doesn't really work when Sonic and Sally go after Mina and Amy, thinking they'll be in trouble. Also Rouge and Nic feel like they're shoehorned into the plot here. Do they really need to be in this story? So this story has merit but obviously, Penders can't execute a good idea to save his life so even he manages to fuck it up here.
The actual 163 we got was Part 2 of The Darkest Storm. And once again, it was way more interesting than this idea.SONIC: THIS ROBIAN, THIS HEDGEHOG (SONIC #164) - When Sonic overhears how much his father resents his condition, unable to enjoy a “normal” life with his wife, Sonic risks all to find a cure. With the aid of his Uncle Chuck, Sonic makes his way into the Robotnik’s nano-tech labs and retrieves what he hopes is the answer to the problem. Unfortunately, Jules is still a Robian at the end, but thanks to nano-technology, he now looks more like his old self. (16 pages)
Uh, why do they need to go into Robotnik's nano-tech lab? The Freedom Fighters were already studying nanites and heck, Tommy has some in his shell! Why don't they just use the nanites in his shell? And also what is the damn point of this? Jules is still a robot but the nanites make him look normal? He's still not going to have a normal life with Bernie! He's STILL A DAMN ROBOT!!! Did Penders even TRY with this story?!?! Once again, it's an idea with merit but his idea just defies all logic.
The actual Issue 164 concluded the Darkest Storm saga and it was a great conclusion and actually upped Elias a little in terms of character. Much better than this idea. SONIC: LAST MAN STANDING (SONIC #165) - Antoine pops THE question to Bunnie. Unfortunately, she’s not able to respond before the gang has to go off on a mission to shut down Robotnik’s power plant before a meltdown in the core. While Sonic does all he can to ensure a safe ending for all, circumstances dictate a sacrifice on someone’s part, and Snively ends up proving he had more moxie than anyone ever gave him credit for. (16 pages if 1 issue or 2 11-page stories if spread over two issues)
You thought Ian Flynn made Antoine propose too early? THIS idea is too early! It hasn't even been ten issues since they got back together and suddenly Antoine's proposing! And also, while I think Snively does deserve to die, I doubt Ken Penders has a good reason for killing him off. And also it seems Penders has focused so little on Snively that killing him off now just feels a bit sudden. And also if Snively died then we wouldn't have gotten Iron Dominion now would we?
The actual Issue 165 isn't a great issue but I'll still take this one over Penders's idea.SONIC: FALL-OUT (SONIC #166) Sonic is racked with grief, feeling responsible for the death of Snively, and drives everyone that much harder when preparing for their next mission. As their assignment unfolds, everyone becomes uneasy as the possibility dawns that Sonic could cross a line he never did before. For the Freedom Fighters, this moral quandary becomes even more difficult when it’s discovered the enemy’s latest plan could result in the extinction of every lifeform on Mobius.
OK, why would Sonic feel ANY grief for Snively's death? Has he forgotten that Snively was his enemy once? And also, this whole idea makes Sonic completely out of character and why would Sonic cross a line he never did before? And also, who would have a plan that could result in the extinction of every lifeform on Mobius? Dr. Robotnik? No, he's trying to conquer the world and roboticize it all. So this idea makes no sense.
The actual Issue 166 was part of Ian Flynn's conclusion to 25 Years Later and THAT issue actually felt like something was happening in comparison to every issue for 25 Years Later Ken Penders ever wrote. And it had an interesting idea too, King Shadow and he's a villain. This one is definitely better than Penders's idea.SONIC: NEW WORLD ORDER (SONIC #167) - Sonic finally is informed of the duties of his new rank: Gentleman-At-Arms. His first task: accompany Princess Sally to Station Square as she sets up Knothole’s first embassy in a foreign land. Naturally, there’s some trouble before the group departs, including Sally’s displeasure when Sonic’s new rank means he can overrule her when it comes to security, as Antoine’s duties as head of the Royal Guard conflict with his proposal to Bunnie. (16 pages)
Seriously? This idea just sounds incredibly boring and once again, we're going to have Sally-The-Bitch in the spotlight. Fan-whopping tastic. And why are we teasing the idea of Antoine and Bunnie proposing? I mean, do we really need this? It feels like a waste of time. And also what's the point of this story? It feels like padding. It doesn't seem to have much of a point.
The actual Issue 167 saw Ian Flynn conclude 25 Years Later with a rather fast-paced story that saw King Shadow defeated and a pretty heartwarming ending. Now THAT has a point!SONIC: OUR HEDGEHOG IN STATION SQUARE (SONIC #168) - Now that Princess Sally, Sonic, Tails and Rotor have arrived in Station Square for the duration, Sonic finds getting around town is more awkward than he likes, thanks to Evil Sonic making the scene. But if Sonic can’t provoke his bad doppelganger into a fight one way, perhaps scoring with Rouge might do the trick. Now if only Sally doesn’t get into the act. (16 pages if 1 issue or 2 11 or 16-page stories if spread over two issues)
Again, this ide just sounds boring and kinda useless. What point does this story have? And Sally once again just seems rather antagonistic towards Sonic here. Penders, you have no idea how to write her character so stop trying to write her. And now suddenly Rouge is back with Evil Sonic. So why the fuck was she with Nic in Penders's idea for Issue 163?!?! And also, seriously? This is what Evil Sonic's doing now? He got a Chaos Emerald at the end of issue 151 and he and Rouge fly away and...he's just making a scene in Station Square? What? What's this got to do with the ending of issue 151?! Plot holes galore we have here...
The actual Issue 168 we got saw the beginning of A.D.A.M.'s conclusion and a rather heartwarming story with Bunnie and Antoine reconciling and seeing Armand D'Coolette one last time. I'll take THIS idea over Penders's idea, I mean Ian's 168 was actually awesome!SONIC: A DISH BEST SERVED COLD (SONIC #169 & #170) - Knuckles and the Chaotix show up at Station Square, mean and spoiling for a fight with the group that attempted to invade Angel Island. Unfortunately, with the new alliance pact in place between Knothole and Station Square, that puts Sonic on a collision course with the embattled echidna. (2 16-page stories)
I'm not even sure what to make of this idea. Is this seriously what 167 and 168 was building up to? Just another Sonic and Knuckles spat? Sigh...that's really old you know Ken.
The actual 169 and 170 saw the conclusion to A.D.A.M. and Tommy Turtle's storylines and the reintroduction of Fiest and the debut of the Special Zone, as well as the Chaos Emeralds being reduced to seven and King Max being restored to full health. Does this sound more interesting than yet another Sonic and Knuckles fight? Of course it does.
And apparently Issue 175 was going to be the time where Bunnie and Antoine propose at last. Took them long enough.
The Issue 175 we got saw Eggman raze Knothole and beat Sonic half to death. Do I even need to tell you which one sounds like a better way to celebrate 175 issues?! Ian Flynn's idea of course!
And 200 was supposed to be Bunnie and Antoine's wedding. I'm sorry but no, that's a boring way to celebrate 200 issues. Sonic vs. Eggman, the final showdown and the lead into Iron Dominion on the other hand, THAT is how you celebrate 200 issues!
So there you have it folks, Ken Penders would have given us a bunch of boring, stupid, generic ideas that make no sense and seem to have very little purpose behind them all. None of these stories seem to progress the comic itself all that well and Ken seems to be leaving several plot threads hanging like the whole SonicXFiona bullcrap, Tommy Turtle' shell of nanites, Tails hating Sonic for dating Fiona etc. Ian Flynn on the other hand actually puts those plots to rest and the comic actually feels like it's progressing. Stuff's actually happening and happening for a reason rather than just happening for the sake of it. Ken...is the complete opposite and his ideas I've just dissected here prove my point. Do you seriously think any of his ideas sound better than the actual Issues 160-200 we actually got from Ian Flynn? If so then you are one delusional twit.
Well that's enough for one day. This is Mixedfan8643 signing out and hoping Ken Penders goes into some dark corner of the planet and disappears forever.